Blogtober '14 | I'm an expert at...

Blogtober14 is a challenge hosted by Taylor and Helene! I'm all for challenges and I thought this would be really fun. If you'd like to join in, the daily prompts will be listed below for each day.

Day 17 | I'm an expert at...

The word expert sort of scares me it makes me think that you are unfailable at something and when it comes to me I don't really think I'm unfailable at anything. I mean most nights I even fail to sleep. But I know it Filipino terms they use it as someone who's good at something. Not even like amazing just good.

I suppose if I had to choose... I'd say I'm an expert at FreeCell. Does that sound weird? Of all things... FreeCell. Yes! It's true!

I remember the first time I saw it. I use to be really into Solitaire in middle school and I'd usually be playing instead of filing like I was suppose to during the office hour so I was pretty pro at that by the time I saw FreeCell. My dad frequently took me and my brother to Costco, just to look around and get samples and stuff. My dad was always one to look at the laptops because back in the 90's they were kind of a weird thing. And I remember one day he pulled up FreeCell randomly on the laptop and started playing. Curious I asked what it was and how do you play. So he taught me. When I first started I literally did not grasp the concept and I was SO frustrated!  

Who remembers the AOL dial up days? And you'd use IE cause you SWORE it ran faster, plus when you'd get kicked off of AOL and you were in the middle of a blog post... well you lost pretty much... everything and that was NEVER fun. So who actually remembers how slow dial up was? Uh yeah. I'm a fairly impatient person. Always have been, always will be #noshame and so to distract myself from watching the loading bar I'd often play FreeCell. In fact, I played it so much it got to the point where I'd win literally every single game I played.

Then we got DSL and well my FreeCell days were over. I've recently found myself playing it again like when I'm on business or conference calls. And I'm still pretty good at it. Not amazing like I once was but still pretty good. Besides that, I can also be caught playing Bejeweled on my phone and especially Bejeweled Butterflies! I'm a sucker for puzzle games. Even before I knew that they were good for your brain.

What are you an expert at?

Blogtober...?

I accidentally somehow stumbled on a hashtag called Blogtober which is sort of like Vlogmas, you blog every single day in the month of October. And if you know me, you know I'm one to attempt as many challenges as I find interesting! But of course I hadn't found out about this until now so, we're starting with today!

 

So today I'm gonna do a bit of recap on things going on or has gone on.... 

The thing that depresses me abut living in Florida is that we don't actually get Fall. It's pretty much summer without the rain during "Fall". So I try to surround myself with as much Fall themed places as I can!

We recently moved to a bigger apartment, so that's exciting except the part where we have to unpack and find a place for everything. Things are still scattered around and I need to find them a home. All the Fall foods are out --- the Pumpkin Spice Lattes (I get it in Frapp), the Pumpkin cookies from Panera Bread and their Autumn Squash Soup they also brought in a new flatbread sandwich with turkey, cranberry and spinach and it. is. amazing. Seriously. Paired with the Squash Soup? It's like Fall, literally in your mouth!

We went to the annual Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party in Magic Kingdom and thankfully it didn't start down pouring until we were about to leave. But since it had been raining earlier that afternoon, the floor was too wet to let out the Headless Horseman for fear that the horse may had slipped. Which sucks, cause that's my favorite part of the Boo To You Parade. We still managed to get a lot of candy and I got to take lots of pictures in my costume. Yes! I dressed up this year! As a Scarecrow! I was standing in front during the parade and I love waving to the characters. The Mad Hatter actually came up to me and says, "are you a scarecrow?" and I was like "yes, I am!" and he goes "okay scare me then!" and Alice goes "don't listen to him!" and I go ".... boo!" and he goes "she's not so scary." and I thought it was funny cause that's how part of the parade song goes. I'm always amazed at how the people who play Mad Hatter nail it so well! The day after I found about 7 mosquito bites on my legs and they all ended up scaring. The one on my arm actually turned into a bubble and I've never really had that happen before. My bites usually just turn into pimples almost and just go away. But now they tend to bubble and they scar. So yeah, now I have a scar on my arm and 7 others on my legs. Great. Right? Sigh.

There was an earthquake back home which isn't too uncommon but this was a pretty big one. I think it was a 6.0 and it was 3 miles away from St. Helena. Which if you know anything about NorCal is incredibly close to both Napa and Vallejo. Most of Napa lost their wine and the stores in American Canyon were pretty much trashed as well. My mom said that everything was fine back home, nothing really fell or anything. I'm still scared to see my room when I get home. I bet everything has fallen over and I wouldn't be surprised if there was broken glass or a broken lamp somewhere. Ugh. And parts of downtown Vallejo were damaged as well. This is the first time that we've had an earthquake so close to us. Usually it comes from the San Fran side, not Napa Valley. The whole week they had aftershocks and just the other day I saw there was another earthquake, a 3.0 near Livermore. It's so insane to see all these quakes on my side of the area. Just because in the whole 25+ years we've lived there there hasn't been one so close to home. I'm glad that everyone at home is okay and the girls are okay and Joy is okay.

I honestly don't know what else I'll be blogging about if I'm being completely honest. I sort of just... jumped into this haha! But I will be talking about a ton of Fall stuff and I still have a haul to edit and post as well as another haul to film. 

I'm working on my Halloween Book Challenge, I haven't finished any books yet and I really need to get my ass in gear because I have a looooong list to get through! Other than that, starting a Mythology class tomorrow which I'm really excited about and trying to keep my head above water. I've sort of crawled under a rock recently and I know I should probably crawl out, but I'm just trying to handle everything I can one day at a time.

So what have all of you been up to? Enjoying Fall? Any plans for Halloween?

Let's reflect...

Yes that is me. Yes that is me looking over my favorite place on Disney property. Can you figure out where it is?

I have been flashing this image that I made some time late last year in my face all week long because... well, I guess I should tell you where I've been. All three of you.

The last three months I have been sucked into a really really really dark place that was full of jealousy and hatred and anxiety and just all sorts of bad bad feelings. I was depressed to the point where I would hardly go to work, I was failing all my classes and I literally did not give a shit if I got out of bed at 3PM.

That is never okay with me.

We do NOT stay in bed until 3PM. EVER.

But I was just in a really dark place and I felt like I was drowning, my life was literally flipped inside out and I didn't know what to do and there was broken glass all over my apartment floors and I was just a big heap of sobbing mess.

So about a week and a half ago I bit the bullet and did something I told myself I wouldn't do, because I'm stronger than that. But there's no sense in asking for help if you really really need it. Right? So for the last few days I've been on this really crazy journey on getting back to who I was, on healing myself mentally, on taking control of my OCD and my taking my life back and for the most part it's been pretty smooth. I did have a few days of extreme depression but I'm okay now and I'm hoping it'll stay steady this way.

I'm taking this month off of everything to just relax. To heal. To get better. Because honestly, in the last ten years since I've struggled with OCD I never actually took the time to just STOP and SLOW DOWN and RELAX. So along with that, I've been reflecting a lot on who I am and what I want from life and where to go from here. 

I've had plenty of idea's of what to do with this blog. I created it as a lifestyle blog that would had followed me into living on my own for the first time ever and that didn't really work out. And now I'm moving into a new place fairly soon and I hope hope hope that I do manage to remember to take this blog on that journey with me into making it my own personal cozy nest. 

Because let's be real. Who wouldn't want to come home to nice cozy nest?

I have started another blog about my journey only because it's open and raw and I decided not to hide anything when it comes to it. You'll be exposed to my demons, my struggles and my crazy bat shit mind. So if you're interested in that sort of stuff, let me know in the comments below or email me and I'll link you over! 

Also, if you have any tips to share when it comes to learning how to relax please also do share those. Relaxing has never really been my thing. Probably why I don't sleep at night. I've started Mindful Meditation (which I'm still convinced I'm doing it wrong) and bits of Yoga to help me sleep but I feel like there should be more I should be doing.

Motivation Monday

I woke up to a rough morning. Which is why it's now 4PM and I'm just now writing this post. And I have about ten minutes to do so before my friend picks me up to get lunch/dinner.

My marriage hasn't been all that spiffy the last two months and it's honestly killing me. I've been meaning to talk about it but I just never know really what to say. I mean, I know things I could say but for some reason every time I open up a new blog post it's like... nothing. Nothing wants to be written. And it's frustrating because this is, after all, a lifestyle blog where I'm allowed to talk about anything having to do with my life. Right?

I've been trying to do my best to keep up my end of the bargain as far as making sure things are fixed between us but sometimes I fall off the wagon and I need to remember that I'm still a work in progress and it's okay. I'm human. I'll fall, but as long as I get up, that's all that matters.

So I thought I would post this today, because it reflects something I need to remember. Hopefully it helps someone else out there as well.

Have a good week everyone.

Motovation Monday

[ credit: Pinterest ]

Whoot! It's Monday! 

Who's excited?

Yeah, me either. 

 

I'll be at work by the time this is posted and I'll probably be leaning on the wall trying not to fall asleep.

Haha.

But I found this quote over the weekend on Pinterest while I was researching some Yoga and Meditation stuff and thought I could use this reminder this morning and maybe some of you could too.

It's easy to get swept up in problems and things that go our way or drama at work, in our personal lives or even just the demons that play in our minds. It's easy to forget our worth, it's easy to lose sight of positivity and the good things in life. Isn't that strange? How the negativity is so much more bolder and heavier than the positivity? Ever wonder why that is? Perhaps misery loves company is more than just a phrase. It's easy to get swept away in our problems which in turn end up ruining our entire weekend or week or month or even year. And it's hard to think that these problems are just illusions in our own minds. Like, what does that even mean?! Surely the fact that my husband did something dumb is not an illusion. Cause hello, IT REALLY HAPPENED.

But I think what it's really saying is that to a certain extent is an illusion because we, as people, are capable of controlling how we react to these problems. Yes the easier thing to do is to let the problem manifest and consume us, to focus all of our attention and energy on this problem and ditch the idea of being productive because we're so distracted. The harder thing to do is to understand the issue and to not let it get to you. But what type of level of understanding do you need? I guess that's up to you.

You could let your problems consume you or you can understand the situation and not let it control you. 

Clearly, that's way easier said than done.

And it's something that I myself am working very hard on remembering. It definitely takes practice and patience and constant reminders.

But friends, I hope you have a wonderful and happy Monday and a wonderful productive rest of the week!

Hello April

[ credit: weheartit.com ]

Whoo! It's finally April! My birthday month!

I actually called out of work today because I've been struck with allergy flu-like symptoms since last Thursday night. Thankfully I'm feeling much better than I did this passed weekend and I can finally feel whatever this is leaving my system! I swear, the east coast gives me the weirdest allergy reactions!

It's also April Fools Day and I don't know about everyone else but I was never really a fan of April Fools. Now that I'm much older, I hate it even more. I just see it as an excuse for people to be assholes and place blame on the fact that "it's April Fools Day" yeah well that punch I threw to your face was no joke! Watch it! But really, it's just dumb in my opinion. All these fake headlines and fake news. I mean come on, you're going to post that you got engaged then end it with April Fools! in the end who really looks like the fool? The person who fell for it or the person who thought it would be entertaining to make a fool of THEMSELVES?

Anyway...

I'm not going to give myself some epic to do list this month  because my head has been in the clouds since this year started and that alone has been frustrating. I like being organized and on top of my stuff. I didn't even realize my own birthday was next week so I wasn't able to make the plans I wanted to. Oh well. Maybe next time. So instead I'm settling for something small. I don't know, after 21 your birthday isn't that big of a deal anymore. Besides, I don't live in Cali anymore so there isn't really anything to do here in Florida and I don't really want to spend my birthday at Disney World. I really wanted to go to Vegas, it's going to be my second year not going for my birthday and that's just depressing.

But here are some things I hope to dabble into this month... no pressure though!

• Finish reading City of Glass by Cassandra Clare
• Review 3 NetGalley titles
• Tidy up my half of the living area mess
• Tidy up desk
• Be happy on my birthday!
• Start buying flowers
• Craft something.... anything
• Try out one new recipe 
• Come up with a better income management plan
• Write "About Me" pages for blogs
• Facebook less
• Blog more

So that's about it folks! I've been major slacking with finishing City of Glass even though I flew through the first two books because OMG Clary is pissing me off so hardcore in this one! So much in fact that I'm looking forward to Simon's chapters! Goodness, she's like gone off into Bella lala land and it's just annoying. 

I better get something to eat and get started on my next class readings.... I hope to come up with more content for this blog, I know it's a lifestyle blog so technically I can write about anything. I'm just being picky! 

What are some things you hope to get done this month?

Motivation Monday

Welcome to another Monday!

I feel like this quote as been following me around since NaNoWriMo. You spend days putting together your novel before writing it and making sure everything is perfect knowing that when you go in to write it... well that's not really how it works. Then you freak out. Followed by procrastination because what the heck is even going on anymore?! And finally you shelf the project. This doesn't have to go for just writing, it can go for anything in life.

We're always waiting in the sense that we're waiting for the right time (wanna know a secret? there's no such thing as a "right time"). Or the right idea. Or if you're like me, you're constantly waiting for inspiration. There's a quote that's like "Don't wait for inspiration, go get it." like, what does that even mean? Is there a magical inspiration field I don't know about where I can gather handfuls of inspiration? 

No matter what the issue is, waiting is going to solve none of them. You're going to wait your life away before making any progress.

What's something you've been waiting for "the right moment" to do?